The Creation of Donald J (stable Jenius) Trump
An essay by Shakey
On one dark day about 71 years ago Beelzebub issued a challenge to Gawd. He said “ I dare you to create the Worlds Biggest Asshole. This can’t be your ordinary Asshole but must be an Asshole of unheard of proportion. An Asshole to put all other Assholes to shame”.
Gawd thought about this. His old pal Beelzebub had been known to yank His chain before ( e.g. megachurches, prosperity pastors, fallen preachers ( Swaggert, Bakker, Haggard ) etc. He knew this would be a formidable undertaking.
But Gawd was up to the task! After pondering long and hard He settled Himself into His seat, squeezed mightily, grunted and with a loud report mixed with noxious fumes extruded a Great Orange Mass.
This pile would soon metastasize into the Worlds Biggest Asshole who goes by the name of Donald J. Trump. Mr. Trump would, over the years, prove himself worthy of Gawd’s tremendous labor. However it wasn’t until 2016, aided by many lesser assholes, a Network of assholes and Russia that Mr. Trump would truly shine.
Now, as those of us who are wise enough to keep a squirt gun next to the toilet know, such an effort is bound to create a lot of scatter. As such, these ancillary masses congealed to create minor assholes such as a sycophant cabinet, MOC’s and other lovely creatures.
After this mighty exertion Gawd sat back on His throne, wiped His brow, breathed heavily and said to Himself “Man, that hurt”.